Meat Paste

Desire:

Delicious animal muscle.

Idea:

Hey, I can pick something up at the convenience store! Oooh...potted meat..

 

Seemed Good Because:

I was drunk.

Actually Terrible Because:

Moral of the Story:

Eww....

Rocky Horror Picture Show

During one rare moment of clarity in my annual Valentine's day bender I found myself watching a showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show supplemented by a shadow cast from the Buckham Alley Theatre. I don't remember how exactly I got there, but somewhere along the way I had bumped into and old Professor of mine who was there to see the show with his wife and 15 year old daughter.

Still trying to figure out why he brought his daughter

Anyway, the show was solid. The shadow cast did a great job, and while the source material is a little strange for my tastes, it includes sex and Meatloaf's brutal axe murder, which makes it aces in my book.

A tradition of such events is the that "all virgins must be sacrificed". This basically means if its your first time to the show you get a V drawn on your head and get pulled up on stage to perform in some humiliating games.

On a scale of 1 to violations of the Geneva Convention, the so called "Virgin-games" tend to span between Teenager's Party Games and Japanese Game Shows. I ended up getting pulled into one of the relatively tame ones, in which all the virgins were lined up and stage, and had to spank the person to either side of them. I ended up on the end, meaning I only had to give and receive one slap to the ass. There was only one problem:

The only person next to me was my Professor's underage daughter. 

It really bothers me that their was already a perfect image for this.

WTF internet?

Anyway, as much as I love sexually assaulting an underage girl in front of her parents, I refrained. 

This story would be awkward enough to be funny already, but the real fun bit was while exiting the theater the girl's mother said to me "You know, I didn't see any spanking up there."

I responded "You are seriously giving me crap about not slapping your underage daughter on the ass?"

Bad News

Drink:

Bloody Demon from Hell

Recipe:

1 oz Jameson® Irish whiskey
1 oz Captain Morgan® Silver spiced rum
1 oz Jim Beam® bourbon whiskey
1 oz Bacardi® gold rum
2 oz tomato juice
2 oz Worcestershire sauce
1 oz hot pepper sauce

Combine all ingredients in a large glass. Garnish with a radish or a celery stick, and serve.

 

Description:

人形の家

1. Swedish to English to Japanese

So, I was in my Theater 100 class today, and we were tasked with performing a selection from Henrik Ibsen's A Doll's House.

Pictured: Henrik Ibsen's Mutton Chops

Not too big a deal. Get to see some mediocre performances of a famous work, with folks flubbing lines and pronouncing names all wrong. Then something marvelous happened. 

A group consisting entirely of Japanese exchange students took the stage. That's right, I got to witness a play, originally in Swedish, translated into English, and performed by people who couldn't really speak either. It was a thing of great beauty.

2.Blizzard

Looks like mother nature is done screwing around this winter.

 

Frigid Bitch

 Here in Michigan we are just getting the first round, but word is other folks have had it rough already. I don't know about the rest of you, but I plan on keeping myself warm with hard whiskey and soft women.

Monday....

1. The Super Bowl

Yes, I know there was a big game last night. Yes, I know it is all anyone is talking about today. No, I don't give a flying fornication about it. 

Football is barbaric. People sit around and watch barely functioning man-children hit each other and make more money then we can possibly dream of. Hell, even before we start spending big money on these idiots hundred of thousands of dollars in scholarships are wasted to push these imbeciles through college, so they can go on to never use that degree someone with more then half a brain desperately wanted but couldn't afford.

And don't give me a crap about them being hardcore. Stop doing steroids and take off the pads, then we can talk about hardcore.

2. Confusion

Some readers expressed confusion over how the SFT server functioned. I have provided the following chart to illustrate:

Whoops

Well, this is embarrassing. The server hosting this site has been acting up this week. Apologies for the delays.

The SFT webserver.