A Hard Day's Night

For those of you who enjoyed my morning shift, here is a gander at what things are like when I get scheduled at night.

2:35pm

Wake up.

3:00pm

Shift starts.

3:14pm

Clock in.

3:15pm-4:59pm

Work dilligently

5:00pm

Deli-manager leaves.

5:01pm

Begin slacking.

5:12pm

Interaction with female coworker.

Female Coworker: I just can't believe he would be with someone so much younger then him!

James: Uh-huh, scandalous ~continues washing dishes~

Female Coworker: I mean, I know we have been divorced for a while now, and I really shouldn't be upset about it.

James: Meh ~continues washing dishes~

Female Coworker: But, we shared a lot of years together. We had two kids together. We were a big part of each other's lives.

James: Understandable. ~continues washing dishes~

Female Coworker: And now he is with her.

James: ~continues washing dishes~

Female Coworker: I mean, I saved myself for him!

James: ~stops washing dishes~ OK, stop.

Female Coworker: What? Why?

James: I see  you maybe three hours a week, tops. We are not friends. We don't hang out outside of work, we don't keep in contact. We just work together.

Female Coworker: And?

James: And now your incessant babbling has moved beyond simply "shit I don't care about" and into the realm of "shit I actively did not want to know"

Female Coworker: ~shocked silence~

James: Now, I never thought I would say this, but could you please leave me the fuck alone so I can wash these god damned dishes in peace.

Female Coworker: ~storms out of deli~

James: Thank you. ~returns to washing dishes~

5:45pm

Female coworker returns with Store Manager. Involuntarily enrolled in workplace sensitivity seminar.

7:32pm

Begin tear-down and cleaning of deep fryer

7:47pm

Large customer rush. Store Manager called back to assist.

8:01pm

Store Manager requests help with counter. Refuse based on complexity and time sensitivity of cleaning deep fryer.

8:02pm

Officially reprimanded for using the phrase "Balls deep in this fryer" in front of customers.

9:06pm

Haul old fryer oil, trash, and recyclables to back of store for disposal.

9:25pm

Request to rename "Waste Management Area" to "The Darkest Depths of Mordor" denied. 

9:45pm

Begin drinking.

10:00pm

Shift ends.

 

10:13pm

Clock out.