Mission:
To provide you, the reader, with the absolute best debauchery based satire on the internet.
Real Mission:
To make enough ad revenue to offset the cost of several addictions.
Update Schedule:
Barring exceptional circumstances, SFT is updated every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday at noon.
Editor's Note: Hangovers aren't typically considered "exceptional circumstances"
Content:
SFT posts are broken up into several categories:
A catch all term for random crap, Updates are likely to include everything from funny pictures to site news to pop culture commentary to interesting links to...well, you get the idea. If it doesn't fall under one of the other categories, it will inevitably get lumped into an update.
In the interest of spreading the influence of alcohol, once a week I drop some of my drunken wisdom in the form of a Thirsty Thursday post. Containing a drink recipe, description, and brief commentary, each post contains everything you need to enjoy a decidedly adult beverage (except, you know, the actual booze).
As
a man of action, romance, and adventure a morally bankrupt drunkard, I have found myself in many a strange and amusing situation. Through the power of the internet, I share these stories with you.
With the advent of modern technology, anyone with a smartphone can now do many things on the go that used to require access to a computer. No longer bound to our desks for cats, porn, and Facebook, we are free to laugh, masturbate, and stalk wherever our lives take us! Through this powerful new tool, I can even share my vast wisdom.
People make mistakes. That's right, even I am not free from the occasional lapse of judgment
(a wild understatement). Here I recount my more ill advised adventures.
There is a lot of media out there. Seriously, A LOT. But fear not, for I sift through the mire of pop culture so you don't have to! Here I present the gems that are truly worth your attention.
There is a man I know. He goes by many names, some normal, some neigh unintelligible, and some so alien hearing them has been known to drive men mad. I, however, have always known him as Doc. He doesn't ascribe to the laws, morals, and ethics of the common man. Instead he follows a rigid code of 9 rules. Having no morals, ethics, or respect for the law myself, I have decided to share his Rules with you.
You have all seen them, be it on a Facebook or one of its predecessors. Ever since the dawn of social networking people have been obsessed with answering random assortments of questions that range from mind numbingly inane to incredibly personal. Sometimes, I get bored and fill them out myself.
