"MORTAL!"
I jerked myself up off the floor and looked around the darkened room. It had a dirt floor and stone walls, and a cold and murk permeated the whole place and suggested it was underground. The only other figure in the room stood in the center of a pentagram drawn on the floor, ringed in candles.
Also, he was a horrifying demon.
"MORTAL! YOU HAVE GONE TO GREAT LENGTHS AND PAID A GREAT COST TO SUMMON ME! WHAT IS IT YOU SEEK FROM THE FALLEN?"
"Ok, wow, if you could maybe dial back the volume a bit..."
"I AM ASMODEUS, COMMANDER OF SEVENTY TWO LEGIONS OF DEMONS, LORD OF NOVEMBER AND SECOND ONLY TO LUCIFER! I LOWER MY VOICE FOR NO MERE MORTAL!"
"Relax there big guy, its just that I have this nasty hangover and..."
"WASTE NOT MY TIME! WHAT DO YOU SEEK?"
"Seek? Last thing I remember I was at a Halloween party watching the Lone Ranger dance to Bad Romance."
Dude busts a surprisingly fresh move.
"I CARE NOT OF THIS LONELY WANDERER OR HIS UNFORTUNATE RELATIONSHIPS!"
"Fine, fine. I don't know, could you make make the Lions win the Superbowl or something? They could use some good news"
"THIS IS BEYOND MY POWER."
"Seriously? What about just a spot in the playoffs?"
"EVEN THE DENIZENS OF HELL HAVE LIMITS."
"Oh come on. They are playing the Redskins today, can you at least make sure they win this one?"
"I WILL TRY, BUT I MAKE NO PROMISES"
"Psh, some Lord of Hell you are."
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