(Fuck you Jim)
"So, what did they drag me in here for?"
"Seriously?" Jim sighed and dug a memo pad out of his pocket. "Your rap sheet now includes such stunning additions as: Public Indecency, Joy Riding, Reckless Endangerment, Attempted Arson, and Aggravated Assault."
"Damn," I whistled as the desk jockey handed Jim some paperwork. "I like Reckless Endangerment. Its got a nice ring to it."
"So what happened?" Jim took the forms and jotted his signature down a few time.
"No idea," I muttered. "Guess I was blacked out"
"For three days?" Jim handed the papers back, and the officer pulled a bag from under the desk.
"Well, I remember bits."
Kind of wish I didn't though
"Well what the hell happened? I mean, while I honestly wish I could say that you getting blackout drunk was rare, you usually aren't this bad."
"Psh," I said, grabbing a cigar from the bag of my belongings. "Probably nothing. Things get out of hand from time to time." I dug around for my lighter.
"Oh come on," Jim grabbed my phone and flipped it open. "Something had to have provoked you"
"Hey jerkass, that's mine!" I looked at the cop. "You going to just sit there for this?"
"Sir, I regret to inform you there is no smoking here."
"God damnit!"
"James," Jim said flatly. "Shut up and look at this." He turned the phone to reveal a picture message.
"Is that your girlfri...."
"Yes."
"With two g...."
"Yes"
"And is she..."
"Yes."
"Holy shit."
"Yes."
-censored-
(I thought it was for the best)
(...yes)
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