Jolly Rancher Vodka

Happy Thirsty Thursday!

Drink:

Jolly Rancher Vodka

Recipe:

1.75 Liter Vodka (Most middle shelf vodkas will do. Swill will still be swill after infusion, but if you break the bank on the good stuff the superior flavor will be masked by the candy anyway)

60 Jolly Rancher Candies (12 of each flavor)

5, 8 3/4oz Containers (These classy glass flasks are recommended, but anything will do as long as it is clean)

1 Plastic Funnel (if you suck at pouring things)

Separate Jolly Ranchers by flavor. Add twelve (12) Jolly Ranchers to each container, ensuring that each container only holds one flavor of candy. Fill each container with vodka. Let sit for eight to twelve (8-12) hours. No agitation or filtering necessary. Chill and serve.

Description:

As the great poet Ogden Nash once said, "Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."

But now you don't have to choose!

You all may remember the popular Skittles Vodka Infusion from way back in 2010. Well, now you can satiate your desire for [uncomfortably] childish hard alcohol with significantly more ease and in much less time!

I don't know who first came up with this particular take on "hard" candy (See what I did there? Here is a hint: there are at least two entendre going on there),

Pictured: The most likely originator

but the tutorial I used can be found at Mix That Drink.

Personally, I think this a big step up from Skittles Vodka for two reasons:

1. There are no foul tasting and insoluble binding agents in Jolly Ranchers, so no filtration is needed.

2. Jolly Ranchers are totally better then Skittles.

I am sure discussion of the second point will be nothing but respectful and informative.

Editor's Note: James, I want you to remember that I am paid by the hour, and one of my duties is screening both your email and comments sections. Its just a rough estimate, but I think you just guaranteed more pay then my annual holiday bonus.

Less time, less work, and the flavor transfers just as well. Awesome.

Be careful though, while the candy adds tons of flavor to the vodka, it does little to impact the potency. This is still ~80 proof liquor you are dealing with, so don't let yourself go overboard because it tastes like a sugary treat.

Protip: As suggested in the comments section of the tutorial, (I know right? Constructive comments, on the internet? Absurd) crushing the candies before mixing and periodically agitating the concoction will significantly reduce the dissolving time. Not necessary, but if you need some tonight and not tomorrow, this might just save your ass.

Variants:

Pre-flavored: Something I tried with Skittles Vodka back in the day that turned out pretty well, though I must admit I haven't done with Jolly Ranchers yet. Given that flavored vodkas are about a dime a dozen, consider using a matching (UV Blue with blue raspberry) or complementary (Smirnoff Blueberry with cherry) flavored vodka when making the infusion. This can intensify the flavor or add a new twist, and if you match well can result in wonderfully delicious liquids. Look here for a list of good flavor pairings.

Infused Rum: Another contribution from the tutorial's comments section (Two constructive comments‽ No fucking way, what happened to the internet?), some might find rum a better liquor for this infusion. Rum, being made from sugarcane and sugarcane by-products, is considered by some a natural partner for a sweet infusion. Personally, I am not a big fan of rum, so I haven't tried this, but if its your thing go for it.

Alternate Flavors: Like many candy brands, Jolly Ranchers have branched out from their traditional flavors over the years. If you prefer the Wild Berry or Sour varieties, feel free to use them in place of the originals. 

Mixing: Make no mistake, this stuff tastes great straight up or on the rocks, but it also works wonderfully in cocktails. Go ahead and substitute whenever another flavored vodka is called for, use it in place of plain vodka to add some fruit flavor to a drink, or, if you want to dilute it a bit without compromising the purity of the Jolly Rancher flavor, mix 1 part Jolly Rancher Vodka with 2 parts Jolly Rancher Soda of the same flavor.